El-Hazard Round Robin

[Lord God Jinnai]

No anime forum is complete without a series-specific round robin! I'll start off, then you guys carry on the story, until either the plot reaches a resolution or we all violently murder each other because of shared lunacy.

Here we go!

*********************************************


Makoto was siting quietly at his window, staring into the night sky. The Eye of God hung silently in the night sky, a powerful symbol of the might of the ancient ones.

"Ifurita," he whispered silently. "Don't worry... I'll find you... someday..."

[Spanner]

No anime forum is complete without a series-specific round robin! I'll start off, then you guys carry on the story, until either the plot reaches a resolution or we all violently murder each other because of shared lunacy.

I'm betting on the latter. But hey, that's half the fun!

Hell, that's MOST of the fun! *Whistles a jaunty tune as he cleans his killin' spork.*

Here we go!

*********************************************


Makoto was siting quietly at his window, staring into the night sky. The Eye of God hung silently in the night sky, a powerful symbol of the might of the ancient ones.

"Ifurita," he whispered silently. "Don't worry... I'll find you... someday..."

No sooner had he finished that thought, then he felt a sharp pain on the back of his head. All faded to black...

When he came to, Makoto found that he was bound spread-eagled against some hard surface. Then, he heard a familiar voice. It was Alielle: "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"Of course," Fatora's voice came in reply. This is BOUND to work!"

Opening his eyes, he faced the terrifying sight of Fatora and Alielle in their bondage gear. Fatora was grinning at him and stroking her whip fondly. "Ah, I see you've awakened," she chuckled in a sinister fashion.

Tugging at his bonds, he protested, "What's going on? What are you doing?"

Fatora ignored his questions. "I've been patient long enough," she said. "For a long time now, I've sat back and watched while you monopolized all of the sexiest girls in Roshtaria. What could they possibly see in you? What do you have that I don't?!"

Alielle very much looked as though she wished to say something at that point, but firmly kept her mouth shut.

"Tell me your secret!" Fatora continued heatedly. "If you don't..." she snapped the whip, and Makoto flinched at the sound. "...things could get ugly, you know what I mean?"

Makoto opened his mouth, and then closed it again, honestly unsure of what to say. Then he tried again, and failed again. Finally, he said, "Um, why, exactly, did you strip me down to my underwear?"

"Tradition," Fatora answered offhandedly. Makoto did not really find himself feeling satisfied with that answer. "Now, quit stalling!"

[Fujisawa4654]

2 posts and this is already getting... Interesting.. lets see if I can help out...  
========================================

"Ok ok," Makoto sighed "Have you ever heard of a lesbian? Becuase that's what you are." He said with just a tad of a grin.

"Whaa?" Fatora was dumbfounded, same went for Alielle who was listening off to a distance.

"You and Alielle share that little special personality... If you're still confused, guess what you 2 do every night." Makoto gave a slight wink and as waiting for a response from Fatora, but she seemed completely stunned.

[Lord God Jinnai]

Fatora frowned, her eyes narrowing dangerously. "Oh, stop stalling! If you think one of your friends is gonna save you, then you have another thing coming. We're deep within the bowels of the palace. Below the dungeons, below the sewers..." The deranged princess then grinned, causing goose pimples to pop up on Makoto's exposed skin. "You can scream and cry as much as you want, and nobody's gonna hear you down here... heh heh heh... shall we get started?"

"Erk," gulped Makoto. He began a renewed struggle with his bonds, but they held tight. "Come on, Fatora! You don't need to do this! I don't have any secrets, honest! I'm just a nice guy!"

"HA HA HA!" laughed the sadistic lesbian. "You think I'll fall for that 'nice guy' crap? Ha! I'll get your secret out, even if I have to whip it out of you!"

"HEEEEELP!" screamed Makoto. He then wet his pants in his fright.

What a loser...

[MrWhat]

Fatora frowned, her eyes narrowing dangerously. "Oh, stop stalling! If you think one of your friends is gonna save you, then you have another thing coming. We're deep within the bowels of the palace. Below the dungeons, below the sewers..." The deranged princess then grinned, causing goose pimples to pop up on Makoto's exposed skin. "You can scream and cry as much as you want, and nobody's gonna hear you down here... heh heh heh... shall we get started?"

"Erk," gulped Makoto. He began a renewed struggle with his bonds, but they held tight. "Come on, Fatora! You don't need to do this! I don't have any secrets, honest! I'm just a nice guy!"

"HA HA HA!" laughed the sadistic lesbian. "You think I'll fall for that 'nice guy' crap? Ha! I'll get your secret out, even if I have to whip it out of you!"

"HEEEEELP!" screamed Makoto. He then wet his pants in his fright.

What a loser...

Makoto was desperate.  In fact, he was so desperate to save his own skin (so that he could rescue Ifurita, of course) that he did something that went against every fiber of his goody-goody being.

He lied.

"ALRIGHT!!" he gasped.  "The, uh, source of my, uh, power lies in, uh, a ruins at, uh, the foot of Mount Lilicoco."

Fatora dropped the whip.  But she leaned over Makoto, grabbed Makoto's face hard enough to pucker his lips, and snarled.  "Are you lying to save your own skin, and to send me and Alielle off on a wild goose chase!?"

"Ubba cubbourse nobot!" Makoto said.

Fatora stood back up and smiled cheerfully.  "Oh.  Okay.  Great.  C'mon, Alielle.  Let's go get us Makoto's power of the harem."

Alielle looked to Fatora.  "But shouldn't we release Master Makoto first, so that he doesn't die of hypothermia, or thirst, or--"

Fatora impatiently grabbed Alielle and pulled her along.  "Details, details!  Alielle, don't you realize by now that, to truly appreciate my magnificence, you have to think of the big picture!"

"Oh dear," Alielle said, looking back over her shoulder.  "Um, Master Makoto?  I'll send you a postcard..."

Makoto couldn't watch Fatora and Alielle leave, from where he lay, but he listened to them walk away.  At least they didn't lock the door, he thought.  But...

He was still securely bound in a cell deep in the ancient labyrinth beneath the Floristica palace, clad only in his soiled underwear.  If Fatora and Alielle were headed for Lilicoco, they might not be back for weeks.  And no one else even knew that he was missing.

Unless he was somehow found and rescued, and soon, he would die a slow torturous death.

Makoto sighed, and shivered, and stared vacantly into the darkness.  Well, he thought, this isn't helping me to rescue Ifurita at all.



Fujisawa looked up from the bottle of sake he had been working on all afternoon.  He gazed through a window of his home, with a distant expression.

Miz had been sitting nearby, cooing over their baby.  She turned to Fujisawa, and spoke.  "Darling?  Is something wrong?"

Fujisawa frowned.  "My 'sensei sense' is tingling..."

[Lord God Jinnai]

"Oh my word," says Meiz. "I hope Makoto and Nanami are all right! You should go out and see if they are. I'd never forgive myself if something were to happen to them."

"Yes, that seems best." Fujisawa kissed his wife and daughter goodbye before running at supersonic speeds towards Florestica. He leapt over the city wall, shot through a labrynth of dingy alleyways, then crawled through a mile of drainage before stopping in front of a sleazy looking pub.

"Fuji-san!" greeted Dr. Schtalabaugh as Mr. Fujisawa entered the establishment. "You made it!"

"Yeah! That 'sensei-sense' thing you told me to try on Meiz actually worked!" laughed the teacher. "Man, thanks a lot! I really needed this night off. I love my wife and all, but sometimes a guy just needs the night out!"

"I agree, I agree!" chuckled Schtalabaugh as he poured Fujisawa a glass of Florestica brandy.

[Spanner]

Hours passed. Makoto continued to stir occasionally in his confinement, but had little alternative but to wait. He was worried for his future, but also bored nearly out of his mind. It didn't help that his soiled underwear was really starting to stink.

Finally, in frustration, he cried, "Isn't ANYONE gonna show up and rescue me?!"

As though on command, there was a brief rumbling. Cracks appeared in the floor, and a chitonous purple limb burst forth. Groucho leapt out of the newly made hole in the stone floor, Katsuhiko Jinnai clinging to his back. The two of them were quickly joined by representatives of the other Bugrom castes.

"HAhaHAhaHahAhaHAhaHAhA! It's pure genius, I tell you!" Jinnai cackled. "Why fight THROUGH the Alliance armies when I can tunnel UNDERNEATH them! The fools will never realize that I've infested their capital until it's far, far too late! And with the annual sumit in progress, all of their leaders are in one place, ripe for the taking!"

"Uh, oh," Makoto thought to himself, and tried to remain inconspicuous.

Alas, it was not to be. Jinnai's pinpoint gaze swung about to focus on his eternal rival. "Mizuhara!" he shouted, half in anger and half in alarm. "How can you possibly have seen through my plan?! Well I won't let you stop me! I - Say, why are you tied up?"

"Erm," Makoto sweated.

Jinnai didn't wait for an answer. "Ha! Does it really matter? What an amazing opportunity!" He smiled nastily at Makoto. "I don't know what god delivered you into my hands, Makoto, but I'd be a fool not to take advantage of it." He wiped a faux tear from his eye. "You've been a splendid foe, Mizuhara. But this is where you DIE! EVERYONE! KILL HIM! KILL HIM VERY VERY DEAD RIGHT NOW! HahAhahAHahaHAhAhahAHa!!!"

[Lord God Jinnai]

Makoto was so scared of the Great Lord God that he peed his pants like a little baby.

WHAT A LOSER!

[MrWhat]

Makoto was so scared of the Great Lord God that he peed his pants like a little baby.

OOC:  Just how many cups of coffee did Makoto have before this story started?  


Unfortunately, Jinnai's loyal elite Bugrom troops obeyed his commands to the letter.  All of them suddenly raced towards Makoto and the raised platform on which he was bound.  Their combined weight proved to be too much for the weakened floor of the cell, and it suddenly collapsed.

Makoto screamed as he plummeted into the hastily-mined Bugrom tunnels.  Dirt, gravel and rocks, and a few Bugrom, fell with him.  His last thoughts were of Ifurita, before the darkness reclaimed him...

When Makoto came to, again, he found himself alone in a small cavern.  There was no light, this deep below the palace, but a few mosses and lichens provided a faint luminescence.  The sound of a trickle of water hinted that there might be an underground stream nearby.

Makoto sat up, groaning and rubbing his head.  He took stock of his latest predicament.

On the plus side, he thought, I'm not tied up anymore.  And Jinnai and the Bugrom didn't fall as far as I did, or they couldn't find me after we all fell, so I'm safe from them.  But it's almost too dark to see in here, and it's even colder in this natural cavern than it was in the cell... and I don't know if I can climb out of here.  I may have been buried alive.

Then he noticed that, though he was barely scratched, the fall seemed to have torn his soiled underwear right off.  He was lost, cold, sore, dirty, thirsty (and partly dehydrated) from his recent 'accidents'... and he was buck naked.

This is not good, Makoto thought.  It might be even less gooder than before.

[Andrusi]

Shrugging off the thought, Makoto decided to attempt to climb out of the cavern.  The first step, he thought, is to find a wall to climb.

Makoto started walking, and sure enough, after a few seconds he found a wall.  He was about to start climbing when he noticed a hole in the wall, and looked through it.  He saw... well, nothing.  It was, after all, a hole in an underground cavern in a dungeon, and not much light gets down there.  He thought about exploring a bit, but then he remembered he was naked, and he certainly didn't want to encounter any moogles while he was naked.  Then he wondered where the heck he'd come up with "moogles", since the word didn't mean anything to him and he certainly didn't know what "moogles" had to do with "cavern".  Then he wondered why he was contemplating the origins of his thoughts while he was stuck in an underground cavern.  As his mind thus ran around itself in circles, Makoto began to pace.

"Ouch!" Makoto exclaimed when his foot suddenly began to hurt badly.  He sat down and inspected said foot, and saw to his relief that he didn't have to add "loss of blood" to the list of things that could potentially kill him now.  Then he looked where he had stepped, and saw...

[Lord God Jinnai]

A ROBOT!

It was a great big rusty robot from the dark mists of El-Hazard's past!

"Oh wow," said Makoto as he beheld the metallic monstrosity before him. "This technology is remarkable... I wonder if..." He reached out and touch it, only to have his power reach into the machine and activate it. "YIKES!" he squealed in horror, reeling back and peeing himself in fright.

The robot lurched upwards slowly, its rusted gears and faulty hydraulics cracking as it moved. It stood fully, reaching a height of about eight feet, and looked down at Makoto with its single red eye. The orb glowed brightly, lighting up the cavern the two of them were in.

"STAY BACK!" cried Makoto.

The robot lurched forwards.

[Kathy Guinea]

And fell right on its metallic robot ass! (or face rather, ass sounds so much better).

Makoto jumped back in surprise,  "Well, that was a let down, I was kinda hoping it would get me out of here."

Makoto walked closer toward the metal monster, examining it's remains when he began to hear a scratching noise.

"Oh great now what?" Makoto said out loud without thinking of the dire consequences that always brings.

Suddenly, coming out from every crack and cevice in the fallen robot were thousands and thousands of...

[Spanner]

...baby dolphin-bears! They proceeded to scamper all around the chamber, making cute, squeaky little "ba-bump" sounds.

Makoto looked around himself in astonishment. "Why, this must be the secret breeding grounds of the dolphin-bears! Dr. Schtalubaugh told me that it has never been seen by human eyes! What an amazing discovery!"

He paused. "Too bad I'm naked, lost, battered, dehydrated, and covered in my own piss. Kinda takes a bit of the sense of wonder out of it. I KNEW I should have passed on that eighteenth cup of Joe this morning..."

"Ba-BUMP!" Turning at the much deeper sound, Makoto found himself being scrutinized by a pair of adult dolphin-bears. Their mood was impossible to read in their beady little black eyes...

[Lord God Jinnai]

"Well, hi!" Makoto smiled at the Dolphin Bears and waved a hello. "Um... fancy meeting you down here. Heh..."

To his astonishment, the Dolphin Bears suddenly pulled out cameras and started taking snapshots of him.

"NOOO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" squealed Makoto as the beasts continued to take pictures of his embarrassing state.

"BA-BUMP-BUMP!" said one of the creatures. Translation: There are lotsa girls at the palace who'll pay big bucks fer these pics! Smile!

"NOOOOOOO!!!" Makoto peed himself again before running off, the flashes of the camera catching his dusty backside.

[MrWhat]

Meanwhile, back at the ranch...  

Londs was at work in the Floristica royal gardens, supervising some repairs to a weather-worn garden wall.  He stood in a wide garden path paved with large square tiles.

He looked down, and raised an eyebrow, as a nearby tile moved.  It bounced in place, two or three times, before rising along one side like a trap door.

Jinnai peeked out from under the tile.  He glanced around, then he looked back down and hissed to the Bugrom that were apparently underneath him, holding him up.  "You idiots!  We've tunneled up into the royal gardens!  I *told* you that the royal meeting rooms weren't this far west from Mizuhara's cell--"

He suddenly looked up, and gulped, as Londs crouched down to look at him with one eyebrow raised.

Jinnai smiled a painfully fake smile.

Londs shook his head, smirking and tsk-tsk'ing.  He stood up, raised one leg, and held his foot over the loose tile and Jinnai's head.

Jinnai whimpered.

Londs brought his foot down hard on the tile over Jinnai.  The tile slammed back down into place.  Londs heard the muffled sounds of Jinnai and the Bugrom falling back down through their shaft under the tile.

A workman walked up to Londs, and spoke.  "Sir?  I'm sorry, but we over-estimated the materials needed to repair this wall.  We've got quite a bit of quick-drying cement left over.  What shall we do with it?"

Londs kneeled down again.  He pulled at the loose tile, and shifted it aside.  He peered down, and saw Jinnai and the Bugrom wedged in place in their narrow shaft, stuck just a few meters below ground level.

He looked back up, and answered the workman.  "That's alright.  I've found a fresh crevasse under this path.  Terribly unsafe.  Let's dump the extra cement into it here, and fill it in."