If they weren't just immature 8th grade males I'd have a fit... unfortunately... guys don't get much better when they are older :p
With guys it's all chicks and football even when they get "older..." :p
Heh. I think you're painting with an awfully wide brush there, Kathy.
Some conversations I've had with Rob via email suggest that in many ways I was much like him when I was in high school. I was interested in science and trains and Robotech (which was before I even knew what the word "anime" meant) which didn't mix well with the prevailing demographics. Mellencamp could have written a song about the sleepy little Michigan town I hailed from. In school if you weren't a football player or a cheerleader, you were pretty much nobody. And my interests made me something of an outcast, for my passion about railroading was seen by many to be an obsession.
And that pretty much was the way it was during my first two years of college. My interests did expand, however. I did a few different things, including volunteering with the Catholic Newman Center as a vocalist and liturgist and auditioning for the on-campus theatre troupe. (By the time I left college I had become president of the parish council and headlined my farewell performance.) I also became an avid role-player. This gave me an opportunity to make new friends and expand my horizons. Getting to meet members of the other gender who had interests and values similiar to my own was a decent perk too.
And the last two years I was in college saw a great transformation. By the time I was a junior, I realized that of the two hundred or so starting freshmen there were only about two dozen or so of us left. So we all started paling around together. And being that we had all just turned 21 within the past year it made for some wild times. There were a lot of nights we tied one on a little TOO tightly, and we did more than a little skirt-chasing.
But when senior thesis finally came around we all knew we had to knuckle down. Our late nights on the town were replaced by late nights in the electronics lab or hunched over our drafting tables. By then I had started working as a draftsman part time at the Soo Locks so that required at least 20 hours a week of my time during which I had to be at least somewhat cognisant. (There were a few mornings I was a little foggy, all the while resolving to myself to NEVER do THAT again!) While I don't regret having the chance to live wild and crazy for a little while, I am grateful that I've left that lifestyle behind me. The bars were full of people in their forties who hadn't and the wear was beginning to show on their faces.
My last six months in college I met the woman who four years later would become my wife. I had returned to my "serious student" MO by then. She had had several encounters with men much like how Kathy describes above and was almost all but turned off to anyone. We met through common friends and got to know each other.
Shortly thereafter, however, I got my sheepskin and promptly lost my job at the Locks. So I headed south toward Detroit to seek my fortune. (I can empathize with anyone doing the "distance relationship" thing!) I'll spare you the details of what happened in the ten years hence, though the email I sent Rob for his college paper showed my maturation process had only just begun.
And so I think it is with many men, Kathy. Almost all of us that were hootin' and hollerin' back in the day now have full-time jobs, mortgages, and children. Those things tend to change one's point of view about oneself and the world we live in. I daresay it changes people's priorities, in my opinion for the better. It's all part of the maturation process I'm glad to say I've surrendered to.
One observation I've made about anime fans is that they're markedly different from the mainstream in their values and priorities. Just about all the anime fans I know have been to college and afterward land decent jobs. And this forum , which caters to the fandom of a very thought-provoking anime series such as El Hazard, seems to consist of people who contrast starkly to the picture you paint, Kathy. Heh. Dare I say "preaching to the choir?"
With respect to football: although I'd be remiss not to mention that while I don't care for football, basketball or baseball I am an avid hockey fan. I do hope you'll believe me it's not the fights I like, in fact, I usually enjoy watching college hockey more because the fights are not sensationalized and made a spectacle of. I love to watch when a good squad can get their passing game down pat and it just clicks, much to the chagrin of yon hapless goalie. It's a game where teamwork is necessary and if executed brilliantly can pay off big time.
Of course, my Lake Superior State Lakers finished nearly dead last in the CCHA and my Red Wings were brushed off the ice in four straight by the DUCKS for GOD'S SAKE! So it hasn't been a good hockey season for me.
Glad I have El Hazard to talk about!
Personally I'd rather enjoy seeing a fan rendition of Ifurita dressed for the bench. I think she'd make a killer left wing. Could you imagine a Demon-God slapshot? I pity the poor goalie that would try to bat away one of those.
Sometimes I think that if I knew what the world was like when I was younger I would have developed my BODY instead of my MIND... heh but I made my choice and I guess I'm better for it... though sometimes I wonder...
I actually avoided military service because I didn't think I had the physical muster to be able to survive boot camp (being the short stocky smart kid I used to be.) Ironically, today my work as a signalman requires I work outside in all kinds of weather engaged in physically gruelling activity--digging trenches, pulling cable (some of it the diameter of my wrist,) unloading trucks, spreading stone and the like. Six months ago I wondered if I would be able to handle it but now know I can do this if I pace myself and don't try to be a superhero. In that respect I feel I've come full circle, though I don't believe I still could do a hundred pushups without feeling it later.
No one wants the 3.92 GPA, summa cum laude, National Honor Society, college grad, girl... they want the easy chick who works in the beauty parlor... feh
Heh. I didn't know you knew my high school class!
In fact, many of the young women I knew back then fit the description you provide. And when I do visit my hometown and encounter one or more of them, I believe I'm better off where I ended up. There's a song out there called "Thank God For Unanswered Prayers" which usually plays in the back of my mind whenever I find myself back there.
I'm glad YOU see that there's a problem with that kind of thinking Tim... but then... you're a smart guy who focuses on developing his mind like I did... that and you know I'd beat the snot out of you for disrespecting women ^_^ -- one of these days I'm gonna pop Joe one... (our youngest brother for those who don't know).
Strapping young lad who thinks he's all that, eh? I can relate. If you ever put my brother and I together you'd never know we were even distantly related. He's in his late 20's now, about to finish his apprenticeship as a union plumber. Just about all the life lessons I mention above he has yet to learn. He lives in our grandparent's old house (they both passed away recently) though I'm dubious of whether he's actually making his house payment or drinking it away on the weekends. And I'm sick of HIS creditors calling ME and threatening me to have him pay them. (That seemed to cease after I sicked my attorney on them.) Maybe I'm just jealous that I never had a chance to live for two wild and crazy weeks in Cancun. Although it occurs to me maybe I'm better off for having NOT been there.
Stick with the smart girls Tim... you'll be better for it... no one will fight you for 'em for one ^_^;
I'm awfully glad I did. When I listen to my coworkers complain about their wives spending their money and running around while they're out here on the gang, I feel very lucky to have ended up with a small town girl like mine who knows the value of a dollar and has a good head on her shoulders.
Your message is a sound one, Kathy. I do suppose, however, that any man who is a member of this forum already believes much the same way you do.
That doesn't make the message any less meaningful, in my opinion.
(Yes, I have three day weekends and my wife is at work today. So I have lots of time to mull over life's little quandaries.)
--me
Mark Engels
Author