Random Disturbing Thought

[Kathy Guinea]

In one class today I mentioned that the only reason we treat  computers like unfeeling machines is cos they cannot talk back to us. When we try to do things the computer can't do, we MIGHT be causing it "pain" but it has no way of expressing it. When you hit all the keys at once and it makes that "beep" noise, it might actually be crying out in pain with the only voice it has -- it's telling you to STOP what you are doing because it cannot handle it... I mean think about how many times the PC speaker beeps at you... that's your computer saying "owie!" ;_;

[Spanner]

Excerpt from Weekly World News (a tabloid):


Do computers dream just like humans? Yes, says expert
By Kevin Creed
Weekly World News

*Insert picture of a computer here*
*Caption* RESEARCH REVEALS: Sophisticated computers have human-like minds.

*Insert picture of some guy here*
*Caption* PSYCHOLOGIST Dr. Wayne Ralstine

BOSTON -- Your home computer's "brain" is so advanced and so complex it even dreams -- just like humans do!

That's the surprising word from noted psychologist and cyberneticist Dr. Wayne Ralstine. Dr. Ralstine has spent years studying how computers think -- the actual processes involved in artificial intelligence.

"It shocked me to see just how similar computers are to humans in the ways they think," says Dr. Ralstine. "Even the experts I talked to, people who design and program computers, can't explain how computers' brains really work.

"What I discovered in my research is that the more sophisticated and advanced computers have become over the years, the more human-like their minds are. My staff and I tested more than 300 computers of all brands, large and small

"When mental pressures mount up in humans, the brain goes into what we call sleep. Some of that intensity is released through dreams.

"We now know that computers do the same thing."

Dr. Ralstine made his discovery by studying the pathways taken by electrical impulses within the test computers and found that, at times, those patterns are identical to those found in the human brain during dreaming.

The respected researcher said there are several ways to tell when a computer is having a dream -- and even ways to tell if a particular dream is pleasant or frightening.

Here are some signs your computer is having a bad dream:

• The print on the screen quivers and shakes.
• The computer makes strange clicking sounds.
• It shuts down for no apparent reason.

Your computer is having a pleasant dream if:

• The screen suddenly gets brighter.
• The computer takes longer than usual to perform its functions.
• It makes a contented humming sound, similar to a cat's purring.

Dr. Ralstine says he plans to release a report in The American Journal of Science in the winter of 1998.


Ah, those wacky tabloids... It's kinda scary to think that there are people who take stories like this seriously AND have access to computers.

[Tim needs time to work it out]

Well, I always thought computers had some sort of feeling.

--- (insert sounding like a crazy man here)

I mean, a computer, especially a machine designed to play games, has to be a depressing notion.  It would not like being alone in a closet collecting dust while one plays new-fangled systems.

And even if they are in use, they can be very angry.  I mean, if you think about a computer in a racing game, what does it get if one gets first place?  It gets second, and third and fourth... up to whatever last place is.  Even if it does get first (Heaven forbid!), it is still upset because one did not get last place.

I always thought it would be nice to give the computer all the places except last once in a while to make it feel better.

And Food Fight!  The computer has a beautiful strategy of slamming you with as much food as possible!  How does it feel to see you succeed in avoiding its food that it has thrown at one!

The RPG is also an eternal struggle for the machines.  It has to face the foe of you all the time!  It keeps trying over and over again to defeat you.  Imagine how happy it is that it finally gets one's characters in the agony of defeat.  It must be estatic!

--- (quit sounding like a crazy man here)

Well computers are strange indeed.  You would be amazed what people would write.

[Saucer]

In one class today I mentioned that the only reason we treat  computers like unfeeling machines is cos they cannot talk back to us. When we try to do things the computer can't do, we MIGHT be causing it "pain" but it has no way of expressing it. When you hit all the keys at once and it makes that "beep" noise, it might actually be crying out in pain with the only voice it has -- it's telling you to STOP what you are doing because it cannot handle it... I mean think about how many times the PC speaker beeps at you... that's your computer saying "owie!" ;_;

That's kind of an interesting point, actually. I told you I'm reading the Chobits manga right? The manga actually gets alot deeper into this question than the anime does. It's totally worth checking out.

Here are some signs your computer is having a bad dream:

• The print on the screen quivers and shakes.
• The computer makes strange clicking sounds.
• It shuts down for no apparent reason.

LOL! No, actually that's a sign that your computer is running Windows. *DUCKAGE* No seriously. that's hilarious Spanner.  

Well, I always thought computers had some sort of feeling.

It kind of makes me wonder about fighting games where you can just walk all over every opponent. even the Boss. Like is it a masochist or something? But every so often, it just seems like the CPU will snap and get uber cheap on you for being bullied constantly. And what's to be done for those poor Alienware machines? Emancipation across the nation!

On another note, your life simply isn't complete without what is quite possibly the largest collection of Computer Haiku on the internet. Some of these really do embrace true Japanese Zen!

[freekling]

The idea of a computer feeling anything is ludicrous, the way it works is not at all similar to a human brain.  I suppose that if you get strongly attached to it though you could imagine it is alive, like sailors with their boats.

[larewen_evenstar]

Wow... if they do have feelings, maybe when they crash completely it's like suicide. And, when people in offices throw them out of windows, it's like homocide! *larey like words ending in 'cide'*

[Lord God Jinnai]

I sure hope to GOD that they have feelings. It would make my enjoyment at KICKING this hunk of junk even BETTER!

**brutally beats his computer, ignoring its electronic pleas and crying**

BWAH HAHAHA! That's right, squeal like a pig, boy! Squeal like a pig!!!

[Kathy Guinea]

The idea of a computer feeling anything is ludicrous, the way it works is not at all similar to a human brain.

... computers don't HAVE to work the same way you do to have feelings (emotional or physical). It's possible for us to eventually develop a kind of sentient intelligence for the machines of the future-- you only say it's ridiculous cos it hasn't been done YET.

The only reason a computer can't "feel" is cos you haven't given it a means to do so. On a less emotional example, a computer can't sense hot and cold unless it's hooked up to some sort of device like a thermometer or some other kind of electronic sensor... We can only feel because our nervous system tells us stuff is hot or cold. If your nervous system has been damaged, you may lose the ability to feel such things... does that make you a machine void of feeling? No, you just don't have the means to do so anymore.

The computers of today are not the energy sucking, vacuum tube powered, slow machines they were in the 1950's and I think it's safe to say that the machines of the future will not be like anything we have today. Transistors and integrated circuits are the difference between those machines and what we have today. You never know -- the next invention may be the one that's going to make the impossible, possible.

[freekling]

I wasn't talking about computers of the future though, I was only talking about the computers we have now.  I think its very possible for us to develop thinking feeling computers eventualy.  You're reading to far into what I was saying.

[Jojo]

That icon is a random disturbing icon, but computers are our friends not food.

That is all.

[Kathy Guinea]

I wasn't talking about computers of the future though, I was only talking about the computers we have now.  I think its very possible for us to develop thinking feeling computers eventualy.  You're reading to far into what I was saying.

And you didn't read far enough into what I said. I said a computer can't express to us that what we are doing to it is not possible for it to do, so it's telling us with the only means it has, that pathetic beep. We only treat them as machines cos they don't start cussing us out when you try to push them too hard -- the topic of the discussion that this came from was a robot rights one so it implies future technology in the first place, we were discussing why we treat machines the way we do. It's because they have no means to express their discontent so we don't think of them as having feelings.

Besides it was just a musing no need to call the idea "ludicrous," just something to think on. Machines only can do so much, you should be nice to them if you want them to work for you.

[Captain Southbird (EHOL Creator)]

And this is how an AMI (American Megatrends Inc.) BIOS equipped IBM compatible screams "AHH!  I CAN'T FEEL MY VIDEO CARD!"

[Saucer]

The idea of computers "feeling" shouldn't be too abstract a concept to grasp. After all, sensory input for all animals is simply information. Electrical impulses, largely similar to entering commands into a computer. It's how the information is processed that differentiates us from machines. You pound on your computer keyboard, it thinks "too many invalid keystrokes entered at once." You slug your buddy in the arm numerous times in sucession and he thinks "ow, that hurts!" Once we fully understand how the brain interprets the electrical signals that your nerves send it, we can train computers to interpret the data in the same way.

[MrWhat]

This topic reminds me of "The Moon Is A Harsh Mistress."  It's been years since I read it.  But from memory, the lunar super-computer "Mike" automagically gained sentience when it achieved a certain level of complexity.

**brutally beats his computer, ignoring its electronic pleas and crying**

(borrowing an image from Spanner...)

Ifurita:  (holds computer like a kitten)  NO!!  Please don't hurt li'l Compy!!

[Lord God Jinnai]

(borrowing an image from Spanner...)

Ifurita:  (holds computer like a kitten)  NO!!  Please don't hurt li'l Compy!!

SILENCE, Ifurita! I am the Lord God Jinnai! I hurt whomever I WISH!

*throws his mother off a cliff before he realizes what he's doing*

... ... ...

Oh shit.