Happy Fun Kalia! Only $14.95.
Warning: Pregnant women, the elderly and children under 10 should avoid prolonged exposure to Happy Fun Kalia.
Caution: Happy Fun Kalia may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds.
Happy Fun Kalia contains a liquid core, which, if exposed due to rupture, should not be touched, inhaled, or looked at.
Do not use Happy Fun Kalia on concrete.
Discontinue use of Happy Fun Kalia if any of the following occurs:
- Itching
- Vertigo
- Dizziness
- Tingling in extremities
- Loss of balance or coordination
- Slurred speech
- Temporary blindness
- Profuse sweating
- Heart palpitations
If Happy Fun Kalia begins to smoke, get away immediately. Seek shelter and cover head.
Happy Fun Kalia may stick to certain types of skin.
When not in use, Happy Fun Kalia should be returned to its special container and kept under refrigeration.
Failure to do so relieves the makers of Happy Fun Kalia, Wacky Products Incorporated, and its parent company Global Chemical Unlimited, of any and all liability.
Ingredients of Happy Fun Kalia include an unknown glowing substance which fell to El-Hazard, presumably from outer space.
Happy Fun Kalia has been shipped to our troops in Saudi Arabia and is also being dropped by our warplanes on Iraq.
Do not taunt Happy Fun Kalia.
Happy Fun Kalia comes with a lifetime guarantee.
Happy Fun Kalia-- ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTES!