El-Hazard Online
General => Non-El-Hazard Topical Discussions => Topic started by: larewen_evenstar on April 01, 2003, 03:11:42 pm
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I know this is kinda wierd but I wanna start a post about how annoying my English teacher is. I mean, sure I have other annoying teachers, but this one takes the whole damn cake!!!! >:(
El'll know what I'm talking about!
I wrote a story for English about bullying, and it's consequences. Now remembering that both me and El were off the day that the teacher told us that we couldn't kill off any of the characters.
Remember me, please.
When Kalia came to our school, my life went totally wrong. She didn't even sit at the same table as me. Infact, I didn't even realise that she was there until the teacher called out the register.
"Kalia Evenstar?"
"Here." She called. Everyone suddenly stopped talking and turned to look at whoever the voice had come from.
"Larewen Evenstar?" I looked around desperately. I had been in the whole of primary and most of secondary one and I had never found anyone with the same last name as me. I'd even looked it up in this book which was supposed to have every single last name in it and it wasn't there.
"Larewen?" The teacher asked again.
"Hmm?" I looked up from my notepad. "What? Oh, right. Yeah, I'm here."
"Rodger Fally?"
"Here." I stopped listening to what my teacher was saying and went back to my own thoughts.
Later on when I got home from school, I went in tothe kitchen and BAM! There she was. Right in front of me. Eating my food at my table.
"What are you doing here?!" I screamed.
"Hmm?" she looked up. "I'm moving in here today. Didn't you know?"
"DAD!!!" I yelled. He came into the kitchen.
"Yes Lar?"
"Why didn't you tell me that you were adopting someone?"
"I'm sure U did. You were probably ignoring me as usual."
"I don't remember that!" My dad, fes up with arguing, left me alone in the kitchen with her.
"Listen you, I don't want you coming into my house, touching my things and stealing my Dad. You either leave now or suffer the consequences!" I was really loosing it now.
"Larewen, I'm not trying to invade your house. Your dad adopted me and said that you knew that was the case and that there would be no problem."
"Well, I don't remember him saying anything!"
I could see she was about to cry. I did feel sorry for her, but in my position in popularity, I couldn't be nice to her.
I felt really rotten in saying that but the next day she was sticking to me like a clam to a rock. Eventually my friends said to me,
"Look Lar, she's bugging the heck out of us! Get rid of her, or we go!" They were serious, that I knew.
"Fine, I'll go talk to her." I stomped off and found Kalia in a corner between the two main buildings of the school.
"Kaly, listen. You're really great but my mates don't want you hangin' around with us."
"But..." Tears began to well up in her eyes, "But..."
I punched her.
She fellto the ground, unconscious. I looked down at her. The true me was coming through.
The next day was the same. She followed me everywhere, even though I had punched her lights out the day before. She didn't seem to get it. I don't like her.
My dad is all over her as if she was the nicest person in the world, and even some of my friends are beginning to go and hang out with her instead of me. I really don't think I can take much more of this.
It's several weeks later, and I'm getting ready to throw either myself or Kalia off a bridge into a swift flowing river with piranhas in it.
ARGH!!! This is so annoying! She acts as if we were related! I've punched, kicked and insulted her so many times now, you'd think she would have got the message. I think I'll go insult her some more. Only trouble is, I've run out of things to say.
I have one word, "HELP!!!" I ran faster than I ever would have thought possible down the high street. Kalia and her gang closely following. My legs hurt. I could hardly breathe. I was dizzy, tired and I just wanted to run into an alleyway and die. But I couldn't. I knew that Kalia had won awards for her amazing ability to see practically everything. All I could do now was run. My energy was draining at an alarming rate, I felt like I was about to have a heart-attack. The bridge was nearing. If only I could get far enough ahead so that I had time to recover from the run and then, when they came near, do something involoving the bridge and the brick-in-a-tight I had always kept there.
It was usless, I was gonna die. My friends, or should I say, ex-friends, had turned on me, and the only refuge I had was a brick and a bridge. I knew I was in trouble.
I reached the bridge, but they were still pretty close by. I desperately began my search for the brick. It was gone.
"Looking for this?" Kalia held up the brick and the tights that it was inside.
"Uh-oh." There was no point in running, I was doomed.
There was no way anyone would notice what was going on, apart from me, Kalia, and her gang.
"You are about to die, Larewen Evenstar," she shouted, "Any last words?"
"HELP!!!" I screamed as loud and hard as I could, but even my voice couldn't save me now.
One of my so-called 'friends' stepped forward, a knife in their hand. They drew the knife up to my throat and slit it.
I tried to scream, but no sound came.
Kalia seped forward now, the brick in her hands. She swung it back...
Now normally, I would have reached out to stop the brick from hitting me, but I knew I was gonna bleed to death anyway.
...The brick struck my head again and again. But it was getting less painful. Everything was fading, and the last thing I heard was the manic laughter of Kalia who drew the brick back once more. Struck me once more. And I was dead.
They took my body and threw it into the river.
My body was found several days later by an onld man and his guide dog. It wasn't even in the papers. Kalia never got blamed. And I seemed to dissappear from all memory.
But now, I wish my last words hadn't been, "help", it should have been, "Remember me. Please."
And my teacher wrote this: Interesting idea explored here, but not very convincing! Be aware of keeping ideas under control, The beginning of the essay wasn't very credible either.
I could have killed her easily for saying that.
But enough about what I thought, what did you guys think?
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I know this is about damned english teachers but my english teacher rocks and i wanted to rub you're nose in it!!! :P
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*Kills Stix, with a brick and a knife.*
Know what you mean, Lar. I'm dreading what she'll say about mine.
Can I post a first draft of something here?
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Yeah, you can. ;D
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Ok, it's a single page, but just the start.
Rebus lifted his head up off of the floor. Where was he? And where was Lori-ian? And what was that smell?
He stood up, shaking. The room was small and damp. A tiny beam of light flowed through a hole in the wall. Apart from that, the room was completely dark.
Rebus could smell something unpleasant, and didn't dare contemplate on what it was. His tongue felt rough and unpleasant and he could taste stale wine in his mouth.
He could hear the rats swarming around his feet, tasting his skin. Rebus felt nauseated.
He pushed his fingers against the wall. Wet, soft, cold.
He slumped down against the wall and pushed his head against the cold wall.
Come back to me Lori-ian! He called out with all of his failing strength. His head fell forwards into his hands and he slept, dreaming of Lori-ian, his exotic beauty. His beloved one. His life force.
***
Rebus had no idea how long he had slept. Hours perhaps. He was still in the room.
The door flew open. And in the threshold, stood a tall woman with jet-black hair and a smirk on her face. Her grey eyes glittered.
"I am Kirisa. And you are Rebus, are you not?" She said, her voice low and dangerous. Rebus knew he must answer quickly, he could feel her mind pressing down on his.
"Yes, I am Rebus. Why am I here?" He spoke quietly, afraid of her power.
"An experiment."
"What?"
"Shush. It will be none of your concern for a while yet. And when it is, you shall learn. Now, to business. You are to come with me, Rebus. And you may call me Kirisa. Be pleased, very few get the privilege."
Rebus stood up, his weak legs shaking. He followed her out of the door and into the corridor, flooded by light. He felt very conscious of his awful smell, his ragged clothes and his untidy hair.
Kirisa smiled to her self. Rebus would please him. She couldn't wait for the Eldan-Kristan Ceremony.
She led him into a small room, of high quality. He stared. There were linen sheets! And a looking glass! This room must have been expensive!
Kirisa laughed at his wide eyes. "You, Rebus, are to stay here. Until I come for you again. The bathroom is down the corridor. Any questions?"
"Yes." Rebus blurted, unable to stop him self. "Where is my Lori-ian?"
Kirisa stared. He knew Lori-ian? The fabled Lori-ian? The Goddess who allowed none to speak her name, except for those close to her? The Goddess of whom no one was named after? It had to be.
"You know the Goddess?"
"Yes. She is my wife."
***
Opinions?
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Hey, that was really cool El! You should write some more!
Well, you better, because I'm gonna bugt all you guys with more stories by me!!!!!!!!!!!!! ;D
Plastic Picnic spoons of death!!!
Evil, psycho bunny rabbits of death!! Beware of their mind powers! - El.
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My English teacher can be a pain sometimes! Just the other day (i know i sound like an old granny!) don't say a thing Lar! Anyway were was i................. oh yeah! I wrote a really great story on a believe it or not a piece of paper and she ripped it up! All that time and effort (ok maybye not effort) and the freekin idiot ripped it up >:(................................ you know this is th longest post i have ever written and it's because i'm still depressed!! :'( :'
And i think you're story is great El ^_^ *pixie sudenly dies!*
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My English teacher can be a pain sometimes!
heh yeah... damn english teachers... damn them all to hell...
LONG LIVE ART TEACHERS! ^_^
heh... ever wonder if your teachers MIGHT be reading this stuff online?
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Art teachers Rock! My art teacher jokes alot :D and he dosent rip my work to pieces!! >:(
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I'd post my English story here (second draft), but I left my jotter in school.
Can I use this thread to post first drafts?
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Art teachers Rock! My art teacher jokes alot :D and he dosent rip my work to pieces!! >:(
Heh score one for US! YAY! ART TEACHERS!
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My art teachers is okay, but she can get really annoying.
I don't care if my teacher is reading this. She deserves all the insults she gets!!!
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I have had English 1st period for three years in a row now, so blech. My Japanese class is so much better, considering that I picked up some Japanese while I lived there.
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Great...now we are talking about Japanese (i only got it right because i looked at the bottom!) I am trapped!
Surronded....
Te he sorry about that...
I'm a tad Clustrophobic! :)
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The point is, I get A's in that class because our teacher is awesome ;D
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My english teacher doesn't know what emotion is. Especially when she's reading.
El can tell you. She's in the same class.
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English Teachers, huh?
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Eh, just do what they say. I've done that upwards 12 years now and I haven't had much trouble with them.
I usually bang up a 3 to 5 page essay and they are satisfied. Teachers dig essays that are lengthy, conventionally correct, have good pronounciation, and have plenty of content and organization.
It's reading 20 books in a year that kills me. I prefer the newspaper or my Popular Science magazines I recieve monthly.
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I wouldn't mind reading the schools books if they werea bit more interesting. I'm a really good reader, and am quite fast as well.
Lets just say that the last book we read, in the time it took the teacher to read it once, I went to hospital for four days, was off school for several days, and still managed to read the book three times.
It was really boring but there was nothing else to read.
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Did Lar mention she was a bit of an egomaniac? ::)
And that she is really, really bitter?
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Elkyra Redsmith - "Did Lar mention she was a bit of an egomaniac? And that she is really, really bitter?"
People tend to remove that from their descriptions of themselves.
For me, though, I would say that I'm fat, but technically I'm not. It's just the frame of my body. I was always big from the day that I was born.
I'm also a big anti-social, but I am also a hell of a listener.
Just so you know.
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depending on my mood, I can be both social and anti-social.
I talk more than most people. BUt am also more quiet than most people.
Weird, I have a split personality.
Our teacher is really nice to kids that are dislexic, but really quite horrible to me and El because we're both so good at English.
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Hmm...
You and El are just slightly ahead of the ballgame, that's all. She just expects more from you two.
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She is also being incredibly annoying! >:(
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Yeh...i'm just realy quiet but if i get to know the person im not so quiet. ::)
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In a way Stix, that isn't true, because you know me and at school you are dead quiet around everyone.
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So i lied! What are you gonna do about it eh eh?
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Well...I could beat you up when you come to my party, but I can't bothered, so, therefore, you are safe. For now. ;)
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Umm... i have a really bad cold ithink its the plague! Sorry i cant come to you're party. (Yes) ;D
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Was that sarchasam? (sp?)
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Not sure? :-/ What do you think?
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Didn't sound like sarchasm (sp?).
Hang on, I can't hear you! How did that...never mind.
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I think it's spelt: sarcasm. But I'm not the best speller so...
You and El are just slightly ahead of the ballgame, that's all. She just expects more from you two.
Hell no. She doesn't expect more, she's very, very critical, picking on the smallest details, nit-picking.
Anyway, can I use this thread to post first drafts of things, as I don't want to start a new thread?
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It's not that you dont want to it's just you can't be botherd! And i don't care if i've spelled anything wrong!
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Yes, Tim kindly told me through IM that it is spelt 'sarcasm'. So thank you Tim. ;D
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It's not that you dont want to it's just you can't be botherd! And i don't care if i've spelt anything wrong!
No, it's because I don't want to clutter the board with things that could be placed in an existing thread (thus wasting webspace). :P
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OK. You really should explain theese things to me as i am very thick!
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Well, here's some news: She's annoyed at me again for writing down notes for my book in the middle of English.
You know how in programs on the TV they always say, 'carry a notebook around with you, and jot down your ideas whenever they pop up into your head.'
Ideas pooping up can be annoying during science when you're trying to pay attention to the wonderful facts about animla reproduction. (sarcasm) :P
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Yes. Or when you pouring that highly flamable liquid in to the test tube with the other toxious liquid!
Thats always a laugh! :P
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Yeah, the teacher wont let me use dangerous chemicals any more after what happened the last time with the white stuff, that wasn't chalk, and he got scared and told me to go wash my eye out ASAP. I don't think he trusts me anymore.
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I don't see why you're perfectly trustworthy...
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I know!!! *spills sulphuric acid* I am totally trust worthy!!!
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Yes...now back to English teachers! ;)
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Yes...now back to Emnglish teachers! ;)
And this folks... is why we need English teachers ;D
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Lol.
You know, Kathy has a point.
(http://www.theone-boards.com/forum/images/smilies/nibble6.gif)
I shouldn't have used that but it's cute. ;D
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Ahhhhhhhhh mad vermon creature rolling thingy!
I honestly never ment to type that...(the plan is working they all think im really stupid.Now i can take over the whole of EHO!)
ahem i mean....yeh... ;)
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That sentance should have been:
I honestly never ment to type that...(the plan is working they all think I'm really stupid. Now I can take over the whole of EHO!)
Ahem I mean...yeah...
(LAR'S EDIT)
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Okay, this has no name, and needs a lot of work.
***
Julie hid in the closet, holding her breath. What if they found her?
She clung to the coats hanging around her, hiding her face, as if it would make it stop, as if it would make them go away.
The door flew open.
"I found her!" Jason cried, his face contorted with glee.
He grabbed Julie's long hair and pulled her out of the cupboard.
He released her hair and pushed her into the circle.
Julie cried out in pain.
Ally was the first to strike. He grabbed her arm and twisted it around.
Julie's eyes filled with tears. Ally had been her friend. But now he had turned against er.
Lee was next, He kicked her violently in the shin.
A gasp of pain erupted form Julie's mouth.
Kirsty slapped her round face again and again. She hated Julied, even when once they had been best friends.
Stephanie pushed her to the ground and kicked her head.
Julie lay on the floor. Tears of pain flowed down her face as the group made her suffer without mercy.
When they finally left, Julie felt too weak to move. She felt too weak to even call for help.
They had broken her. She was in so much pain, not just physically.
She had trusted them.
And they had hated her.
***
What do you all think?
Any suggestions for a title?
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What do you all think?
Any suggestions for a title?
OOH OHH I Have a title!
"SUCKS TO BE YOU JULIE! HAHAHAHAHAHA!"
like my title?
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*silence* cough cough.
It was really good El. ;D ;D ;D ;D
But Kathy...
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Kathy...good title but still Kathy... :P
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Still... Kathy needs some praise. Keep thinking of titles Kathy, and you might make it some day.
Lar
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Good title Kathy! ;D
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Hey, El, how is your story about the rat woman coming on? Floyd the fluffy pencil case!!!! ;D
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;D
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;)
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It's not Floyd the fluffy pencil case, it's:
F.F. (Fluffy Floyd) the mutant pencil case.
:)
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Even Bigger ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
(for El and Lar not in that way!) ;)
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*blink blink. blink blink* huh?
Stix what you on about?
Hey, after what happened on the hill at school today, anything is possible. ;)
Sorry about wrongly naming the pencilcase El.
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The Bob thing. Bigger...
You don't get it do you?
O.K we must never speak of the incident on the hill again! ;)
If you do get it please tell me.
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I get it!
And yes! The incident of the hill still lives on!!!
And remember when El...I'll shut up.
EVERYONE!!! MARK_ENGELS IS HERE!!!!
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Here's a poem I wrote.
As usual, no title. Any suggestions on this front would be good.
Also, I'm having some trouble with the rhyming, so don't make the crittism too harsh! ;)
Oh and, thank you Lar, for helping me write some of it. :)
***
I am dead
I am bound
Inside my head
'Til I am found
I am blind
I must ache
I've lost my mind
This is fake
This heart is cold
Someone free me
The air is sold
I can not see
Death is here
I am numb
I can not fear
I crave the sun
So many cries
Not a sound
I need the skies
I feel the ground
I am the cold
This is insane
I am the sold
Made my silent refrain
I am dead
I am bound
Inside my head
'Til I am found
I am blind
I must ache
I've lost my mind
This is fake
***
Thanks for reading!
Any help would be gladly recieved.
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I know i have read it in school already but i like it!
Keep writing! ;D
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No probs! I love that poem though. I liked the one by W B Yeates (not sure if thats the right name though) The Stolen Child.
Come away! O' human child.
To the woods and waters wild
with a fairy hand in hand
for the owrlds more full of weeping
than you can understand.
That's not the whole thing, but I can't be bothered trying to remember the whole thing. I know it pretty well too! ;) ;D
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What do you think of the new words?
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I love the new words. They fit really well! ;D
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Are you sure?
I wasn't sure about the "I must ache" line.
I think I'll post it on MT...
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No, that line fits perfectly, it sounded a bit off earlier, but adding that line was a really good idea. ;D
Oh, if mrs Cook had read what we were saying about her earlier... ;)
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Lol!
;D
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Is it just me or can everyone else see 2 Hey! Post me somethings 2s? :-/
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No, but marriges and adoptins has disappeard! It's not fair! >:( >:(
I'm actually panicking amazingly a lot right now!!! :'(
I think that you're right. I just checked, and there are two H!PMS!'s!!! ARRGGGHHH! Whats going on???
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I can see 2 Hey! Post me something 2s! :-/
WHAT IS GOING ON?!
I'm confused. :-/ ??? :P
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I don't know what the .... is going on!!! ARGH!!! Someone do something!
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Dude! Get back at her with [link]www.ratemyteacher.com[/link]
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Well, most of the people who posted in this thread are from scotland, so technically, that is quite difficult.
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Yes, we are in the "South south, and yes, south again, US" ;)
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Who knew this topic would live on this long? ^_^
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No one. :o
Now, does any one have any work to share?
Oh God. I sound like a Brady!
NO!!
*Think "The Brady Bunch"*
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when I fimish the fic about Lye, and the other person, who currently has no name (trowa...sorry GW day)I will post it here.
Lar xxx
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I'm typing out "Blood Sisters", so I'll post it when it's done. :)
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I'm convinced that one has scarred me for life. :P
*Stabs knife into paddys back* Well, okay. That was relativley normal. ;) :P
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Lol.
Okay, here we go...
Blood Sisters
They looked really innocent. Twin sisters and best friends, what could be more charming?
They were identical, wore the same clothes, did all the same things.
All the same things.
Victoria and Rachel grew up with their parents, their father, an alcoholic who hit them often, spilling blood more often than not, their mother, depressed and refusing to acknowledge that abuse.
That was when it began.
Once, when the girls were seven, they were down at the river with the family dog, Wolf.
The girls were alone with the dog.
Sandy was scratching Wolf behind the ears.
Wolf was also a frequent victim of domestic abuse, and had been cut behind the ears recently by the twin’s father, who was drunk and savagely hit the dog with a pair of scissors.
As Victoria scratched the creature, the wound opened slightly and blood dribbled out.
“Rachel!” Sandy called to her sister “Wolf’s bleeding!”
Of course, they had seen blood before, and seen blood leaving their own bodies, but they had never seen anyone else bleeding though. It seemed like an intimate process, taboo, something personal.
The twins watched in a mixture of horror and dark delight as Wolf whined in pain.
This became a regular thing, the twins were fascinated.
However, eight months later, they had bled Wolf too many times, and he died.
So what could they do? They were obsessed; they had to see blood, to see it leaving the wound.
They would capture small creatures, mice, rats, anything, and take them up to their attic bedroom. From there, they would hurt the animal, just enough to break skin, then they would watch in fascination as the animal bled. Most animals would last at least five or six sessions, however sometimes they would catch a stray dog and drag out its pain for months.
By the time they reached their eleventh birthday, they had led over 100 animals to a slow death.
Eventually, there was nothing else to bleed.
The girls slipped into a depression, and could not be roused out of it. It, mysteriously, lifted suddenly when their drunken, mean father disappeared mysteriously, and his body was later found in the woods, drained of blood.
But then, once more, there was nothing else.
Soon after, Victoria and Rachel were put into an orphanage, after the police determined their mother took her own life, bleeding messily all over the floors.
Death seemed to follow the “unlucky” twins, bodies of fellow orphans being found dead in the toilets.
Shoddy police work left the girls looking innocent, but Victoria and Rachel weren’t stupid, and they knew the police weren’t completely stupid either. They would be discovered if they didn’t find another way. Another way to feed their addiction.
So they had to find a place to get rid of the bodies. And as long as they prayed on other orphans, people who no one cared about, no one would come after them.
When the girls turned fifteen, they left the orphanage, still as pure as newly fallen snow, and found work, and a home. Things went slowly at first, but they soon had a custom made house, fit for a murderer.
Everything was normal in the house, except in the basement, where there was a huge bath, a tank, a pump, a manhole and various awful looking items.
Every so often, they would invite a wondering child or a homeless person into the house, and make them a delicious looking meal, which was poisoned with enough rat poison to knock a person out and drag them down to the basement.
From there they would gag them, strip them and chain them to the wall.
Usually the victim would wake during the first stages of the bleeding, would regain their senses soon after and begin to panic right after getting their senses back. But it was useless.
The girls would drain them of their blood, watching in delight as they were drained of blood, the blood flowing into the bath.
They would they unshackle the corpse, and lay it in the bath, floating in it’s own blood, and pump acid into the bath. Then, wearing tin masks to avoid inhaling the fumes, they would sit and watch the body dissolving. After that, it was simply a matter of using a jack to tip the bath and pour the congealed mix down the drain.
So things went on, day to day. In public, they were ordinary women with ordinary jobs. Rather rich women, who seemed to have no need to work, but ordinary women none the less.
Downfall came one day, when a victim survived the attack.
John Smith, a rich widow, was wondering the streets. His wife died recently. He had been so upset, she was everything to him. He left the house – he couldn’t stand it. Then he saw them. Two women, beckoning to him.
He approached them, who seemed to think he was a tramp. They welcomed him inside, presented him with a traditional home made meal. He was so sleepy, he took a bite
Suddenly, John was alert again. The food… It was poisoned! He leapt from his place, knocking over the table and ran from the house.
Soon, the police came to arrest the twins, who went quietly as they heard the police raiding the house.
The girls were sent to court and tried together. When Rachel was asked why they had killed so many people, she replied, “You do not understand us. You never shall.”
They were separated, sent to different prisons, isolated from everyone else. They knew better than to try to escape, it was all over. Neither twin was even let near other prisoners, in case they tried to kill them as well.
Things went on, day to day until they both died quietly, at peace at last in their prison cell beds.
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*cries* I'm frightened...and I have a sudden urge too...*stabs el*
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Great, now I'm de- :-X
Voice - I'm sorry, the service you requested is no longer available, she is in a box on the way to Thailand. Have a nice day.
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Lar- *waves goodbye to the box* ^_^
The story about Lye, will probably never be finished. So therefore, I will never post it.
Although, I am thinking of writing something sometime soon. So if I do I'll post whatever it turns into.
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You know your sig is really, really long? :-/
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Yeah, I know, I'm gonna change it in a minute. It's just...it makes my posts look longer and more meaningful. *hears boat loads of laughter in the background* What?!
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That's better!
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I still think it needs some editing. But that'll do until I find something better. ;D
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Well, we're going back to school soon, so reviews on the new English teacher will be posted soon! -_-
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Wooo!!! New teacher!!! ;D *gets scary teacher* *hides in corner of room* I did that all last year, I was up at the back (well, near the back) all year. ;D
Isn't it funny how all of the teachers in our school, when they were getting really bugged by some kid, Sian, normally, they would swap them with me?
Kirsty- Art- swapped with me.
Sain- Geography- swapped with me
Billy and Ross- art- swapped for some reason or another, so I spent the whole year sitting next to one or the other of them. Why everyone said they both had a crush on me, I don't know. :P
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No, I've never noticed that. ^^;
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It's funny, ain't it? I wonder what'll happen next year. :P Oh well, only one more day to go. :bawl
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Don't make me cry. :bawl Too late.
And edit your sig! PLEASE!
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When I find something better to put in it, then I will. Until then: NO!!! >:(