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Messages - Lord God Jinnai
16
« on: July 03, 2004, 10:58:00 pm »
It was a typical day in El-Hazard. Makoto, Mr. Fujisawa, and Ishiel were taking a nice, relaxing stroll in the park. As they passed ancient ruins #4856, a tornado struck just as a planet-killing asteroid crashed through the atmosphere.
Makoto: So, who's going to Rune's party tonight?
Fujisawa: Can't. Miz and I are gonna see a concert at the Pavillion.
Ishiel: Anybody know what tommorow's weather forcast is?
Makoto: Sunny, with a chance of fire and brimstone.
Ishiel: Ah. Better bring the umbrella then.
17
« on: June 24, 2004, 12:09:00 pm »
Fujisawa:*sees Fatora and Shayla making out* Humph. I always thought you two were a bit... fruity.
PA-DUM-PUM!!!
18
« on: June 05, 2004, 10:54:00 pm »
Fujisawa: Well, Jinnai always said that he had an... EXPLOSIVE personality. *snicker*
Shayla: *groans* I hate literal metaphor jokes...
Jinnai: Bwah hah ha! My campaign to conquer you all is a... FLAMING success!
19
« on: June 01, 2004, 08:33:00 pm »
(continued)
PANEL 6:
Nekkid Shayla: I'm not Afura, you asshole! *beats poor LGJ up*
20
« on: June 01, 2004, 08:33:00 pm »
PANEL ONE:
Jinnai: Aha! Good, we managed to find an empty photo kiosk. Wake up, dimwit! It's time to take our passport photos.
Ifurita: Mmm... yes, Master.
PANEL TWO:
Ifurita: CHEESE!
Jinnai: DIE MAKOTO!
*click*
PANEL THREE:
Ifurita: Gee, Master. That was fun!
Jinnai: Indeed. Now let us run along and get back to the consulate before... Wait. Strange... my danger senses are tingling, warning me of incoming pain...
PANEL FOUR:
Jinnai: GACK!
Ifurita: Huh?
PANEL FIVE:
Nekkid Afura: Damn it! What are you two freaks doing in MY bathroom?!
Ifurita: Eek! Someone call mall security!
21
« on: May 30, 2004, 01:41:00 pm »
TAKE ONE:
Miz: Hey, baby... what's your sign?
Fujisawa: Do not enter.
Miz: Doh! *facefaults*
22
« on: May 07, 2004, 12:53:00 am »
Lesson for today: Never EVER let Fujisawa light up one of his farts, even as a practical joke.
Super Strenght + 56% Blood-Alcohol level = Explosive Gas Emissions
23
« on: April 17, 2004, 10:10:00 pm »
Londs: Oh no! I see a miniature Eye of God floating in the air before me! It must be a vision! An dire omen of things to come!
Snooty Alien: Don't be rediculous, insignificant life form. I am merely a superior being from an advanced civilization who came to this world to observe your pathetic kind. I took the form of your primitive orbital structure because I read your tiny minds and was able to ascertain that you fear yet respect the structure. So then, plebian life form. Take me to your leader so that I may learn how such tiny, unevolved creatures like yourself manage to somehow exist. I don't doubt that I will be bored, for a summary scan of your primitive world shows me that your basic grasp on science and mathematics are paltry at best. But no matter, I shall try to occupy my mind in a manner that I am sure you couldn't possibly understand. Now then, quit your pointless stalling and take- OH MY GOD! AAAAAHHH! IT HURTS! IT HURTS!!! THE PAIN! I'M DYIIIIING!!!!!
Ifurita: Oops. Sorry, Mr. Londs. I didn't mean to set fire to your floating beach ball thing.
Londs: Oh my goodness. There is a God! HAHAHAHAHAHA!
24
« on: March 31, 2004, 02:47:00 am »
Sadly for everyone in the Universe, it turned out that the Eye of God ran on a Windows operating system.
25
« on: March 21, 2004, 12:48:00 am »
Librarian: SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
26
« on: March 16, 2004, 07:57:00 pm »
Nanami: Wow... we're transluscent. Either we've both died and have become ghosts, or Tim needs to lower the transparency on Photoshop.
Makoto: Nanami... quit it. You're breaking the fourth wall!
Nanami: Oh, be quiet. Why don't you go and powder your nose or something, you cross-dressing freak.
Makoto: Maaan, it's times like these that I wish I had a backbone. *cries*
27
« on: February 29, 2004, 08:12:00 pm »
Shayla's Ghost: Yo, gimme more booooooze...
Fujisawa: GAAAH! Where's a damn magical ghost-sealing camera when you need it?!!
28
« on: February 17, 2004, 11:37:00 pm »
Nanami: Oh wow! We're in America! How cool! I've always wanted to see the leading nation of the Free World!
Shayla: Oh, big whoop. I don't see what all the hub-bub is. This place is a dump! A giant slum on a planet full of slums. Gimme Florestica anyday.
Ifurita: (talking into com watch) What was that, Master? Oh... ok... ok... gotcha! Over and out! (aims key staff and blasts Shayla into the Next Dimension)
Shayla: X_X
Nanami: Oh my. What a violent culture. I love it! (trots off to buy a gun)
29
« on: January 27, 2004, 07:38:00 pm »
Fujisawa: So, you want me to kill Ifurita? Sure, for ten crates of vodka, I'd kill God Himself! Can I just ask why?
Diva: Humph. You dare ask me why? That aggravating little fool has stolen the heart of my beloved General, appeared in more scenes during the tv series than I did, PLUS she gets more fanmail! What other reason is there?! And not to sound bitchy, but she's a real ditz, you know? And what's with her outfit?
Fujisawa: Yeah, ya got a point there. Just between you and me, I've been wanting to kill the little twit for a while now, too.
Diva: Oh really?
Fujisawa: Yep.
Ifurita: *annoyed* Gawd, you guys! I'm sitting right here! Can't you plot my death AFTER I leave the room?
F&D: No.
Ifurita: *cries*
30
« on: January 24, 2004, 03:39:00 pm »
Jinnai's thoughts after sampling some ramen spiked with Cactus Dan's Arizona Hot Sauce.
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